i want to be happy.

of everything..

i am glad of what i have now.

since then,

i've been blessed.

syukur alhamdulillah.

i'm still learning..over time and time.

how do i deal with this kind of thing.

how do i deal with this "happiness"

how do i act each time i won't get it.

whatever it is that i wanted.

things like this...been repeating.

ever since then.

same kind of thing, different setting, different people.

do i blame the hormones?

for making me happy?

for making me depressed later on?

in time,

i'll learn.

that the people that i met,

they're all worth it.

....

moga kita tetap bertemu dan bersama di syurga sana.

happiness

once,

you felt happiness.

you found reasons.

...

happiness and pain

everything comes in pair,

in two.

it won't be three.

after you

i always wonder..

each time i came

each time i went there

what did you think about?

how did you feel?

are you happy?

are you excited?

one or three

what's worse..

being number one or three?

one,

you are alone.

in a race, in a competition, you may have won, but you are, alone.

your rivals despised you

did runner-up and second runner-up truly shake your hands as an act of honor?

salute you?

despite how professional they are,

they might have felt it,

i hated you. 

hated your guts.

envy.

wishlist: Snorlax

i don't care, i want this.

2019.

yess dah ada target in life

#bengong

link

people change.

what does it mean by "people change"?

i believe,

the phrase best describes a situation in which, in a relationship, the other party, has started to treat you differently.

turned to talk differently

even if they still care the same,

the behaviours have changed.

it's not the same anymore.

they just said whatever they want,

before they wouldn't talk in such a way

they would be careful

but now..

i believe, when this does happen, both party would realize it.

the state of their relationship

what has it come to be

why does this happen?

why can't you turn back to how it was?

..it's all because..

words.

words hurt.

the other person might not say it what he/she felt,

sometimes, your hurtful words..were killing a little bit of love in their body...love cells, i might say

they died, unable to regenerate.

unless..

both of you did something to heal it again..

even if they heal..

the scars were still there.

scars couldn't heal,

they stay forever.

didn't they?

people change,

and when it happens,

nothing would be the same anymore.