Wednesday, July 31, 2013


I believe in life, we always strive to success. We want to accomplish something. Unless you're a zombie....well,  I think zombies have also ambitions. To eat human flesh. ahha

Everyone's aspiration might be different from others.

Housewives. What do they wish in their life? It could be something as simple as seeing her kids and husband happy.

I used to have so many dreams. Big. I wanted to do this, achieve that. Now? What has happened? Sometimes, when I see those 'adults' living their life, which seems to me quite dull, I wonder, what do they want to accomplish in life? I don't know what is it, it seems to me their life is so messed up. Getting married, have lot of kids, buying this and that, so unplanned and then having money problem. And then couple fight and then..

No I don't have dream like Sheldon Cooper to win a Nobel prize. I'm a weeabo thus you know what a weeabo wants.

It's hard for me right now. I don't really love what I am doing right now. kirai desu.

Of all the things in this profession, the only thing that interest me to go on is....the diseases. Sometimes you get to face patients with diseases that you've never heard of. Though I'm not a physician to tackle the disease, a dietitian still need to grasp what the disease is all about before prescribing a suitable medical nutrition intervention for the patient. I'll feel it's something new, something exciting to learn for me whenever I face this sort of thing. It's also because I hate to only be doing the same routine everyday. To me, there's gotta be something new to excite me. Not that I hate routines, I love to be structured, but at the same time, I tend to get bored. So, excitement please come.

Plus, I don't really like doing counselling. To say I hate it, it's too strong a word. Because, at times I did like it. Most of the times, I HATED IT. There, I used it.

I chose to come here not that I love it, neither do I have passion for it but because I need security, and stability.

What I've been doing right now is, just follow along the trend. I could, actually go the hard way, to do what I may (or may not) like, for instance, joining the training scheme by industrial company or get another degree. Start from below, with low payment and try to grow from there and be an engineer. hoho. Reality is, that would be stupid. Time wasted. Why would someone with excellent record like me do that, I think, when I could just be living an easier life. I chose to take this course in the first place because I want a job spot at the government sector, and live an easy life. I would have taken Engineering or Maths even, if I don't care about getting a job after graduating. Let's get back to that sole reason of mine.

I believe people don't really choose their job because of self preference. They may just end up there unplanned. It could be due to several reasons. Their husband works near theirs, kids' responsibility, house, money etc. They got no choice other than carrying on their life as it is.

I don't know what will I accomplish here, being here, and working here. Even if I plan to escape from this, I need money. Lots of it.

Because of this, I became kind of halfhearted at times, no passion, no love, no looking forward to the next days. Thus, what do I want to accomplish?

As a result, I look at other aspects in life. Like doing something I never did. Something that I doubt I'll be able to accomplish it. Like what? Like joining a marathon.

ahha~ I'm going for the half-marathon (21 km) because I want the t-shirt! It's 21 km man....which is supposedly impossible for someone not athletic like me.

Nothing is impossible. I could train myself. So far, my record is run/jog for 30 minutes without rest.  This 21 km should take average people about 3 hours and a half, so.....I have to train. Back then in USMKK, I went for Health/Palestine Run which I think took us about 10km. Hmmm. I can do this!

Next, on November, there's Penang Bridge Marathon. ahha~ But that one I only go for 10 km...It's too much going for it consecutively for two months.

Anyway, this is just a short tem target for me. My long term? Ugh....let's leave that to chance? Nevertheless, this is something that excites me. Love it. Can't wait to do it and finish it!